Yes, I realize that I talk about breasts a lot — hell, most of my search-engine viewers come here because of it (best search term today: “big boob lady and lil short man motorboating”). I don’t see why girls can’t talk openly about their bodies … almost as if it’s a “dirty” or “derogatory” thing to do. It’s nature, people! Okay, and yes, sometimes it’s silicone. But still, I refuse to let that politically correct thing be in charge here. I don’t practice it in real life, why start here?
So here I am, like every night, searching for all things weird in the underground part of the interwebs. I often get scared on these streets, but I owe it to you readers to keep things interesting. During my travels, I have found a few interesting/odd inventions for boobs. Mainly invented by men, but who can blame them? Here are my favorites.
There’s a thing called ‘wrinkled cleavage.’ Women would prefer that it didn’t happen (or at least, not yet) … and men are just downright terrified of it. So terrified in fact, that they demanded something be invented to stop this atrocity! Then came the Kush. Not of the plant variety, people. Okay, so they try to say it can also be used for comfort. For tender breasts. Support. The main attraction, however, is stopping cleavage from wrinkling. You know, because nature will never take its course when you put a piece of plastic between your boobs.
That model’s boobs are fake (not that I’m against it, settle down), so of course they make the Kush look like its working. Perky, eh? The reality however is vastly different. Let’s be real, if I put that thing between my boobs at night, it would never be seen again.
Or maybe I’m just a hippie.
The odd inventions that came in close were:
Enjoy the rest of your weekend, and be kind to boobs.