I love new inventions, especially when they are strange and unusual. They produce in me a warm cocktail of contempt for mankind and an odd feeling of excitement. I’d like to share with you some of my favorites, along with my thoughts on their buyers. Today’s category: Pillows.
The Ostrich Pillow. When I first saw it, I was a bit confused. I like to sleep my way through life, meetings & class as much as the next person … but just how does this thing make it easier to do so? Or even more enjoyable?
I also wonder what people are thinking when they put one on their head. Are they feeling validated? Does putting the pillow on their head make them feel better about all those missed ‘being cool’ opportunities in high school?
They walk into a room full of people, pulling out their Ostrich Pillow, looking around trying to count how many people are looking (Oh yeah, buddy, I got one. I’m that cool). Finally, the orgasmic moment comes when they squeeze their head into that tiny hole (hold your applause , thank you). And just like that, their ego is patched up and golden.
Or do they simply need the pillow and only wear it out of necessity? Do they like to punish themselves by way of public humiliation? Is it possible they believe the pillow will give them powers of invisibility?
They walk into a room full of people, sit down. Immediately, their neck begins to ache and drowsiness sets in. They knew they shouldn’t have taken that ambien before class. It seems an impossibility to lay their heads on that cold, hard desk. But alas! They have the Ostrich Pillow! Pulling it out slowly, they look around the room hoping no one is looking back. Quick slip of the head into the hole, and everything goes black. Not only does the pillow cause invisibility, it also pauses time … your nap can take place without interruption.
Let me make clear that I would sport an Ostrich Pillow like no one’s business. It would not be for ego-stroking, nor to be invisible — I would simply try wearing it because I like to make people feel uncomfortable. You bet I’d slip that thing on right in the middle of my fancy dinner at the Olive Garden.
Any other fun pillows you have come across? Do share!
Images are linked to their sources.